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I am writing this just in time to save my boss from saying these words to me “You’re Fired!” I mean does he really think I do nothing else but watch football and drink alcohol.
Now for a quick recap to keep him happy.
Southampton 3 points just. PELANTY OR NOT A PELANTY, that is the question. Oh well a win is a win. The most exciting thing of the day was a young lad at the Twelve Pins getting a bit gobby to our group when he split some drinks and I said to our lot, leave it – people are just getting tetchy and it is not worth it.
Mistake 1 – This young lad told me to shut the fuck up. Shocked at such foul language, me being a lady and all. I politely said “don’t speak to me like that as I was not even talking to you”.
Mistake 2 – He should have learned from mistake 1 and just apologise there and then. Because I thought chivalry was a thing of the distant past. In steps Dan, a young man himself but a senior educationalist, interjects. “Don’t you dare speak to Jen like that.” I was like Oh My Gawd I have a knight in shining armour (the other lot I go with are just well old). I so wanted to give Dan a hug, I was so, ooh look at me a damsel in distress. Yes, I know those of you who actually know me are sniggering right about now. CARE!
PSG away, the favourites to win the group. Oh my, weren’t we shit and very nervy, but we got a point. Yes a point. We didn’t lose and yet the media (and including some of you on social media) felt the need to go on and on and on. Zzzzzz. About how we got a draw. More Zzzzzz. Sorry, well excuse me – away in the Champions League against the favourites to win the group is a good point in my opinion. There were no headlines singing our praises, nothing about resilient Arsenal, nope just how shocking we were. But hold on, just some 24 hours later, the so-called mighty Spuds played at Wemberleeeeeeee in front of a record attendance and lost. Headlines this time. “Unlucky”. Really! Just fuck off you biased twats. Well the bonus to that was there are much more stupid Spuds out there than I thought and willing to spend money to watch them. Can the press really crawl any further up Kane and Delle Belly Ali’s arse? Me thinks not.
Anyway back to the Premier League – Hull away. I could not even go because one of my football buddies got married that day. Good old Trevor thought were is worse than Hull and decided to get married in Pitsea. Lovely wedding though with the rest of the footballing fraternity, oh and I better mention that the bride looked lovely as well. 1-0 lovely jubbly, was it Iwobi or Sanchez, it depended on what app you were on at the time. Oh let Iwobi have it. PELANTY to Arsenal and red card. Harsh to be honest but Sanchez did not convert it in any event. Wallycott, sorry meant Walcott (that auto correct can be so cruel) 2-0 cruising now, come on lets be ruthless and kill them off. Oops another Pelanty but at the other end, Cech threw himself down trying to get a bit of action to starve off the boredom, 2-1. I thought oh oh is this where it all goes Pete Tong. Nah! Alexis atones for his earlier missed pelanty. 3-1. Xhakaaaaaaaaaaa, what a beauty, proving a point, not that the Coq has been playing badly but Xhaka just showing what else he can do 4-1. Nice
Next up Nottingham Forest in the league cup, quite impressed with the team selection. Lots of love for Super Nicklas Bendtner. Xhaka, at it again, with another thunderbolt. 1-0. Pelanty (the press are going to hate us even more with all these Pens). Up steps Lucas and it’s his first goal for the Arsenal. 2-0. Lansbury, so naughty with his sneaky tackles, should not even still be on the pitch really. Jealously because he was not receiving the same love as Super Nic. 3-0 Lucas for his second. One way traffic, the Ox finishes off. 4-0 minimal effort, bish bosh job done. No doubt some people will still have a moan. Yawn!!
Next up are the Chavs. Oh no I can feel the swearing creeping back in I have been doing so well but I really well and truly hate those bastards. I genuinely thought I was mellowing with old age; but clearly not. The thought of seeing Costa Coffee on our pitch makes the bile come up. I so hope I can keep calm. Firstly, I really want 3 points and secondly I would really like us to finish with 11 men. We have the beating of those West London jumped up &$(*s, but for me the team selection is so key in this game and can he (AW that is) finally get it right and set the squad up with those who have those the right mentality out there. Only time will tell.
Until next time #upthearse
@GoonerJen18Follow Jenny on twitter here